Sam in a suitcase & a discussion about maternity leave

Well, an entry in another month. I can’t believe we’ve been trying to get pregnant since April! The time has gone fast, but every negative test is worse than the one before. I have decided that my next testing day is this Sunday. As far as I can tell, it will be 14 dpo and about when my period would be due. I know a lot of women only wait until 10 dpo (OMG- that’s today!!), since some tests MAY give you a positive result as early as that, but I’m going to try to last a little longer so that I don’t waste a test and dash my hopes too soon. It is so weird that I am madly anticipating and also really dreading Sunday. I would love to know I’m pregnant but I also like the feeling that I COULD be pregnant and I hate starting over. This cycle is particularly trying because it is the last chance before my trip to see my family in Indiana. We are planning on going to Cedarpoint Park in Ohio soon after the wedding. I would LOVE to be begged to go on one of their famous roller coasters and have to casually respond, “Sorry guys, I can’t go on that. I’m PREGNANT.” WooHoo!
OK, and I did succumb to the temptation that I swore I wouldn’t do- I looked up my EDD if I am pregnant now. How bad is that?! In case you’re interested, I’d be due on March 14 (going by conception on the 21st, not my LMP because my cycles are longer than normal). I like that I wouldn’t be pregnant in the summer too. In south Texas, we think about that. I love the weekly chart you generate at http://pregnancytoday.com/resource/theweeks.htm. I would be in my 8th week when I got there and in my 9th week when I left. Wow! That’s a lot!! And I always look at Christmas too. I would be in my 29th week. A nice round tummy to show off but not in the miserable last month or two. I think perfect. Boy am I obsessing and setting myself up for a fall, or what?!
To celebrate the day, tonight we are going to Randolph Air Force Base to see their fireworks. We went last year and it was great! They also have live music, carnival type food booths, etc. It will be fun! And it starts late enough that it will be cool outside.
The 11 year old girl I watch, Amanda, is leaving for her Dad’s house in Chicago. She will be gone a month. I will really miss her! While helping her pack I asked her if there was a favorite stuffed animal she wanted to bring along. She thought a minute and I turned around to get clothes out of her dresser. She then said that yes, there was one. When I turned back around to see what she had picked, I saw her plunk Sam into her suitcase. Awwww! I had to leave the room because I started tearing up. She packed her baby brother! On a more serious note—it is much easier to plan activities for a 11 year old and bring the baby along than it is to plan activities for a 1 year old. I counted up the work days I have until my vacation (and Amanda’s return). Fifteen. Surely I can handle 15 days, right? I am worried that Lillian will think we just watch TV all day.
Lillian and I discussed maternity leave yesterday, surprisingly. She actually wants me to take a maternity leave and come back! I joked that it would be too weird to take one child to daycare to come watch one child (Amanda is usually in school). But she wants me to bring the baby too! I couldn’t believe it! Of course, she mentioned that Sam would have to be getting all the care, love, etc. that he gets now. I think I could do it! The nursing may be a problem, but we’ll see. He’ll be older then and less likely to get into trouble in one room in the house. Wow! Stay with my baby all day AND get paid for working. I love it!!